Unplug to Reconnect: Tips & Advice for Going Off-Grid
Hello friends! Welcome to episode 15 of the Mindfully Well Podcast.
Today I'm going to talk to you about knowing when to unplug and retreat inward.
Which basically means:
unplugging from all of the “needs” and “to-dos” and tasks of your life to find stillness and quiet.
getting back to the basics of you as a relaxed, calm human being and taking a day for yourself without a phone
going into the woods for a long weekend
taking a vow of silence to reconnect with yourself and step away from all of the craziness of life
I believe having off-grid time is necessary and should not be ignored — AND should be done proactively not reactively. In this episode, I'm giving you some extreme and simple examples for how you can start unplugging, going off the grid, and start to reconnect with yourself (which can also be translated to chilling the F out and giving your nervous system a break ;) )
Let's first talk about the reality of the world that we live in, which will help us understand exactly why unplugging and going off-grid is so important.
Close your eyes and imagine your childhood. Let’s go back to how things used to be before all of the technology that surrounds you existed. People were not glued to their phones constantly. You couldn't access the internet from the palm of your hand like you can now. I remember, we had one computer in our house with dial-up Internet which meant that basically if my sister or brother wanted to take over the phone or the Internet all they had to do was unplug the the phone jack and it would completely kick you off. It was savage times ;) in my house and it caused some disagreements but that's what we did - we didn't all have our own access. If you have a similar story then you probably feel me.
Let's think back to our parents and our grandparents lives. This means before Instagram [yes, oh my God!], before Bluetooth and AirPods and being able to sync your phone up with your car while you're driving, and all of this cool stuff that we can do now. Before the Internet and Netflix. I think there used to be like three TV channels that you could watch at certain times the day or something and now we have subscriptions to Netflix and Hulu and Disney+ and all of the other things you can subscribe to, and Internet that fuels at all that. You don't even really have to think about your router, it just works.
Let's go further back, before the Internet, before TV, before radio, before the lightbulb.
The lightbulb was patented less than 150 years ago so within the past 141 years so much has changed and what we find is there's been a major shift in the rhythms and habits of human beings. As technology has advanced faster and faster in such a short time we have not gracefully adapted with it, AND how could we?!
It might seem like we've adapted or whatever, feeling like superhumans with all of this access to technology but the truth is more people than ever are sleep deprived, which leads to a whole slew of health problems physically mentally, and I actually found the stats online that on average Americans spend 24 hours per week online. That is one day per week that we are online actively doing whatever the hell we’re doing.
And it makes sense. I was just telling Chandler this and we were thinking how our time spent online is probably more because we both work digitally. Because our businesses are all online our entire livelihoods depend on the Internet. It's just wild to think that one day our weeks are going toward the Internet, whether it's fruitful or not.
I found another really interesting stat from the EPA that said the average American spends 93% of their life indoors (87% actually indoors and the other 6% is in their cars). So that's only 7% of our entire lives spent outdoors.
Now, I’m not saying we should abandon ship and move into the woods and throw all of our iPhones in the river or whatever, but I am saying that all of this access to technology and information and the ease of access is having an impact on our health. There are better ways to utilize technology and electricity that doesn't totally zap the life out of us.
Before electricity and Wi-Fi, humans used to live by the sun and the moon. And I imagine you've heard this before. They had candles and oil lamps and those resources weren't infinitely available. You couldn't just burn your favorite candle 24 hours a day and expect it to last that long. They knew it would run out and knew you could only use resources for certain tasks or things that you needed to be doing.
Have you ever tried to do something by candlelight? It's not really that easy.
It was just different back then and thankfully we do have access to electricity and lights and technology and everything that we have, but I have a feeling it’s disconnected us too far and it's helpful to get back to the basics.
Unlike us where we can like stay up all night and not notice or we can notice over the course of time but we can keep our lights on really late at night and keep being productive and keep getting stuff done and overworking, people used to wake up just before sunrise, do all the things needed, and then wind down with the sunset. Living in Seattle now I try to imagine that routine. Until recently the sun was setting at like 4:20 or 4:30pm which would mean I'd be waking up at like seven, working until four, and then my day will be done and that seems so unimaginable but like that's how it used to be.
Humans used to be in sync with their circadian rhythms and the sun & moon and now we just keep our lights on all the time and overwork until we are completely drained and exhausted and stressed and our relationships are strained and ourselves are depleted.
And it's really sad. So how can we re-balance the scales of the old-school ways with the perks of the new school of now?
I would like to offer you some solutions, ideas and inspiration for unplugging, going off the grid, and reconnecting with yourself to ultimately find a little more balance in your life.
I'm gonna start with the “most extreme example”
It's only extreme because it's not very common but it's actually very simple which is literally going off the grid. Like, the grid meaning outlets and Wi-Fi and access to the Internet and GPS and all of the actual electrical grid.
We do this often because we learned the hard way to prioritize going off the grid and make it something that we don't do reactively. Because we both work online all the time we know the importance of counteracting that with something very simple.
You can do this many many different ways:
primitive camp
rent a cabin or tipi or yurt
rent a campervan
What we’ve found that works for us is to get a small off-grid cabin and stay for a few days. What that looks like for us is basically finding a little place in the words away from everything that has no internet service, access to natural water and no running water, no electricity (which means there’s not a fridge or lights), and is really secluded.
We pack according to where we’re staying so that all varies depending on where you are. We’ve found a few places close to where we live and have lived that work really well for us that I’ve linked to below.
When we lived in Louisville, we found a little off grid cabin in Indiana that is wonderful called Fox Haven. It's basically a little cabin in the woods you have to walk almost a mile to get to, has a wood-burning stove, wonderful oil lamps, a composting toilet, no running water (they provide potable water). For a couple years when we went there every few months and I had some really beautiful insights and ah-has in that space and I'm really grateful that we found it.
Going off the grid is finding a space that really works for you and allowing yourself just to exist wherever you are. I know that probably sounds vague but that’s what we do when we go off the grid. We turn our phones off and tune back into the natural world.
An alternate version of this:
if there's not an Airbnb nearby you could go tent camping
try to do this in your house *this would be challenging because you wouldn't be completely unplugged and might be a little more tempted but you could choose one day and say you're not using any Wi-Fi and electricity.
You can do this anywhere as long as you make your phone/electricity rules and constraints and then stick to them.
I do encourage you to check out going off the grid and into the woods to really experience a reconnection with nature and unplugging from technology.
Some other simple ways that you can implement unplugging into your days (which I shared in a previous episode I think it was the last episode) is you can get a little timer for your wall outlet that your router plugs into and make sure it makes everything kick off at 10 o'clock or whatever time so you can like force yourself off of your phone and your computer. You can also use the do not disturb modes on your phone.
Those are kind of a daily maintenance things to keep yourself in check but really going off grid or doing something a little more extreme than just your daily habits are kind of what we're going for here.
Another thing that you could do would be to plan a do-nothing day and this is a very open-ended idea. It's just kind of a fun way to think about your days. Like if you're the type of person who schedules every single thing you're going to do every single day this might be a really good place for you to start.
Pick one day and literally do nothing. You're not allowed to plan, use your phone, make appointments and phone calls. Or, whatever you want your rules to be. Maybe it's just “you're only allowed to read all day and go for walks”. Do Nothing Days are really fun to implement into busy weeks.
Going with the flow is such a relief from regular life.
Another thing you can do anywhere anytime is to take a vow of silence and I don't mean this from a religious perspective or any type of way besides not talking. That's it.
It's just a thing to do to try to experiment with. The first time I did a vow of silence I was in my yoga teacher training and our facilitator said “OK right now we're all gonna take a vow of silence - text anyone you need to text right now let them know you're not talking until tomorrow afternoon”
So basically, you're just silent. You don’t talk out loud, to other people or text or get online — like zero communication.
You could probably do this many many ways, like go in the woods or to a retreat center.
The main pieces of your vow of silence is to set your time frame set, your constraints. tell people you're doing it, and do it for however long you want to do it.
It's really interesting to notice your habits when you're in an experiment like this. I remember the second time I did it. I came home and had to feed my sugar glider (she's my little pet and I talk to her all the time) and realized how much I talk to her and my plants and to my surroundings. I constantly thank the things around me and I am very communicative. Throw taking a vow of silence I got some insight around “why am I talking” and what my reasoning behind it was versus just filling space.
So, if you're not ready to go into the woods just yet and you still want to reconnect and just get quiet, a vow of silence is a really cool way to go about it.
What happens when you do this? Like, why am I so jazzed about going off grid?
I think going off grid is really really essential to the creative process and human processes and just existing in this world that we live in.
When I do this for me:
it allows me to reconnect and appreciate nature more
it allows me to crave dirt and grass and fresh air and bird noises and silence
I crave it all whenever I’m not in it
it just helps me love life more — like all of the life around me
it allows me to go slower. I am really fast-paced and really productive. I’m a to-do lister and checker-off-er…it is just part of who I am. I'm very driven so I also really need do nothing days and slowness and stillness and silence and solitude, and that helps me re-calibrate
it helps me settle into myself and do nothing and still be worthy and valuable and myself
My accomplishments don't make me and that's kind of what it's come down to. I can sit in the woods forever and be completely content with who I am as a person.
Going off-grid helps me slow down and notice the world around me more so even when I'm not off grid. When I'm walking through my neighborhood I'm constantly stopping and checking out the flowers and the blooms and the bugs in the grass and everything growing and I notice a lot more around me since I've been going off grid for three years now.
It's definitely a conscious intentional choice, the slowing down and unplugging, and it's been one of the best things I've ever done for myself. It also helps me remember that my work does not define me. My work does not validate me and I am I'm not a slave to my phone. It's not a part of me — it's a tool that I can use you do really cool stuff and connect with people all around the world, to make money, to communicate with people who are far away. It's a tool. It's not essential and it's not something that I can live without.
One time when we were at a little off grid cabin it was a really still winter night and we walked outside and stood on the porch for a while. Everything was silent in the world. There was no noise, no bird sounds, like I didn't even hear our breathing. It was just completely silent and a little unsettling and also really cool to experience actual total silence.
It's hard to explain but there was nothing and it was everything.
I also have more gratitude for food and water and electricity. Going off grid helps me be very grateful for the access that I have to electricity and Wi-Fi and all of the modern-day appliances in my house. I don't take them for granted. Stoking a fire every night is way different than turning on the oven.
It has helped me really appreciate what I do have and also appreciate the elements that can provide for us —water fire air — it's really really cool.
The last thing that was really interesting for the first time was when we experienced boredom for the first time. Maybe ever. You know when you're a kid and you're like “oh I'm so bored I'm so bored this is horrible” and you're not actually truly bored?
I realize now that boredom is way different than what we like to make it out to be. We were off-grid one time during the summer when days are really really really long way long we woke up with the sun, moved about, read, wrote, walked, sat, and did all of the basic things and at some point I don't know what time it was we looked at each other and realized we were truly bored. Like actual boredom. It was kind of shocking and hilarious being able to actually experience. And, I realize not all people get to do that and I have the luxury and privilege to “experience boredom”
So overall obviously I just have a greater appreciation for life and myself and my sanity and creative flow. Going off grid allows me to really connect to this deeper creative self within me (and I believe we are all creative so I'm speaking to everyone when I am saying this) that I can get the space and the time in the solitude to dig deep inside of myself and have something come up. Something meaningful, fruitful, beneficial or insightful and to me that’s the creative process.
It's not just going to sit in the woods with no shower for three days (which sometimes happens when you don't have a waterfall nearby) but it's really really cool.
Also composting toilets are so cool and they're not gross or weird. I am a major fan of composting toilet. If you plan to go off the grid you likely will have a composting toilet so be prepared for that. It's not as bad as it sounds and it's not bad at all. I remember the first time I used one and was wondering “what exactly is this”, and you guys, it's just a toilet that you don't flush. That's all.
Off-Grid AirBnBs
INDIANA
KENTUCKY
WASHINGTON